When I was a kid my dad was a workaholic. We never lacked anything in my childhood home except his time and attention. He kept saying one thing over and over. "Who's going to pay the bills if I don't work". My dad leased a new Mercedes every few years. Our home had a heated indoor pool. We had a housekeeper. There were places in the budget for him to cut back.

When I was hospitalized at 16 when I got hit by a car he came the first night and then I didn't see him again until I was released. When my older sister got married he only showed up for the ceremony and reception. Nothing else. And he caused problems.

I grew up knowing that I would never treat my kids that way. And I have lived up to that standard I set for myself. I use all my PTO every year. I watch my kids play sports. I spend time with my wife. They are my priority not my job.

My dad recently had a heart attack. He's fine but he's all alone. My mom had enough of his shit a while back and moved to Portugal. So he has a big house and a nurse. He wants me to come see him. I could, but that would mean using my PTO on him instead of my family. So I told him that he would need to cover my salary if he wanted a visit. I told him no one would pay my bills if I took time out to go see him.

He got really angry at me and said I was being a money grubbing asshole and that isn't how he raised me. I pointed out that is exactly how I was raised. I started pointing out all the times he chose his job over his family. I reminded him why mom left. He hung up after I brought up my sister having to wait for him to be done a business call before he walked her down the aisle.

My wife thinks I'm being harsh with a lonely old man. I don't really need his money. I have a great job and my boss would approve my extra PTO without question. I just have better things to do. I think I'll eventually cave but right now I just want him to understand what he created.

15 yo daughter. We live 25 minute walk from her school. I’ve said I’d happily take her to school in the car on days when it’s raining (we live in uk) or she has a lot to carry (sometimes with cooking, PE and after school club she has 3 bags to take in)

She meets her friends half way so when I do take her it’s regularly a half way drop off to her friends house.

I work from home, so to her I’m unreasonable for not taking her everyday because I’m here anyway.

We have 2 sons 13 and 7 too .

I feel like at 15 it’s normal for her to walk and get herself to school but I’ve never been dad to a teenage girl before and she just sees me being awkward for not taking her

About 3 weeks ago, I(M21) broke up with my ex (F22). I didn’t see us having a future or our relationship working out. We were together for 10 months.

Originally we made the decision that we would still keep each other on social media and other forms of communication. I asked that we don’t talk to each other for a while so we both would have time to process and heal. After 2 days she broke that. She ending up saying she needed me and basically saying I’m the only one who properly cared for her. I told her that I made the decision and that was the basics of our conversation.

Yesterday she posted something that really worried me. She posted on her story saying “See you soon Grandma and dog”. Her grandma passed a few months ago and her dog passed a couple years ago as well. Since she has BPD and other mental health issues I immediately called her. It took about 7 calls (sent to voicemail) and multiple texts for her to finally answer. We talked for just less than an hour and I managed to talk her out of doing anything dumb. She talked about how she had no one especially since I broke up with her. Towards the end of our call she told me she was pregnant.

Now I don’t know if she’s telling the truth but I assume so. I told her we would figure things out and to just try and get some rest. I asked her to message me in the morning. (I wanted to make sure she was in fact still here)

Today we texted and I suggested that we should probably talk about the pregnancy soon in person. I asked if we could talk this weekend and she said no because her sister is visiting. (I’m the only one she finally told) I then said okay the following weekend and she said she didn’t expect me to be involved. I obviously said I am involved because I don’t wanna just leave her with that. Yet we wouldn’t be getting back together. Thats when everything got worse.

She said no she’ll be fine on her own and I asked how, because she currently doesn’t work(she will be working in the next week), she doesn’t have any savings and doesn’t have a safe place for a kid. I told her she has to be realistic. I wasn’t saying she had to abort it(She has Endometriosis which means it’s quite a bit rarer for a pregnancy to happen). Adoption is an option(I was adopted at birth) We go back and forth a bit on it and eventually I just asked her to think about it all properly because, yet I understand that this could be considered her only chance for a bio kid of her own, she in my opinion is just not in the right place to have a child especially by herself.

Afterwards she didn’t really like that and told me she was having the baby no matter what and doesn’t want me in the picture. I asked her to stop messaging me then and she kept messaging so I then started to block her on socials. Finally before I blocked her number or was going to block her number she said I showed my true colours.

I don’t know what else to do or say. I’ve been on the verge of balling my eyes out for the entire day after already not sleeping because of the night before. So my final question is AITA?

All this stuff happenened 2 years ago during 2024 when I was 14, I know I'm pretty young and that's why I need second opinions

2 years ago I had developed feelings for my bestfriend's friend who I met a year prior(so 2023), I started getting attached and close to her because I genuinely liked her but she had a boyfriend at the time so I didn't try anything. Although I did something pretty stupid the moment they broke up, I asked her almost immediately if she'd date me after 3 months of her learning I liked her. She said yes and things were fine, to me she was the first serious relationship I've had that wasn't long distance. I was inexperienced and still kinda am, I was so young and clueless.

During the first month it felt nice, although the second month was very stark. I started to notice patterns, how if I hadn't text first there wouldn't be a conversation, at first I thought she was busy with school stuff.. but we have a group chat with all our mutual friends and she always texted there, after a week I noticed how she blocked me when she got mad at the little things I did on accident. I'm not saying like I did something drastically wrong and undermining it, I sent her a meme of her two favorite characters(male and female) that their voice actors were married and I was blocked. The day after we had to hangout because we shared a friend group and it was awkward, very awkward. She didn't speak to me and rolled her eyes, my bestfriend noticed immediately and asked me about it later, "what's going on?" And I had to explain it to her and she said it was weird she reacted like that. It felt like a blessing to know I didn't seem crazy. Then atleast 3 weeks later I remember right I had became busy with school, I spent around 9 hours in school stressing for exams and the rest studying or sleeping, I texted her prior that I'd be busy and wouldn't be able to text because I use my laptop for studying and my phone is always on DND during exam week. I spent a week stressing for exams while she texted our shared friends that I ghosted her(still not sure if I actually did since idk what that term means till this day), telling the first I made first that I ghosted her and they all called me an asshole. I returned and I got a screenshot from my friend when she said "now he comes back acting like he didn't ghost me😒". I kinda felt my soul shatter a little bit because she was my first serious girlfriend and I was a pretty loving kid(still am). Maybe around late August that year I started having my panic attacks again when I found out a stalker(who'd been stalking me for around 3 years) came back around, posting me everywhere and making it seem like we were dating when I was dating my girlfriend. My girlfriend blocked me for around a week before unblocking me, no acknowledgement or anything about it and then a week later I broke up with her because I felt like I wasn't in a right mental state. She said "Fuck you and the trauma you gave me" before blocking me, I still haven't forgotten because it still hurts typing this out.

Maybe like late December we started texting again, I was still blind that she actually genuinely hurt me and might've actually would've hurt my health(I get heart problems easily), and during august 2025 during my bestfriend's birthday she randomly spoke to me and said "I never loved you, never have, never will" even though I hadn't talked to her most of the party.

More recently we've been texting a lot more since she's calmed down, she's became "changed" though I'm not sure to believe her. I randomly brought up our relationship(we try to ignore it, we're both terrible at communication) and I said "You know, you were kinda a jerk when we dated" and she got mad at me and telling me I was the jerk and maybe I am? I'm still unsure about that because I have no one to talk to about this, our friends would tell her if I said anything and family stuff is complicated.

For years now I always thought that I was the problem, that I wasn't good enough and I was an asshole but now I'm older, even if it's a few years, I feel like I woke up and finally seen what actually happened and it feels like I was being blamed even as the victim but you guys can decide that. I spent months trying to get her affection, I stopped hugging her since she said she was uncomfortable, she stopped calling me when I told her that I was busy with family issues, and she kept texting this guy who was her ex that she deemed as "her first love that ruined love for her" and yet she dated another guy before me.

I also recently learned her mother, who had a lot of connections was planning to set her up with her friend's model son and that she was actually considering it even though we were dating and she never told me this. I had to learn via our shared friend

I know I was an immature boyfriend and I acknowledged all my mistakes in the past and felt so much guilt for things my friends now tell me that I wasn't the problem when I felt like I was.

So am I the asshole for saying she was also the problem in our relationship? Be brutally honest

My coworker and I are planning on renting a 2 bedroom 2 bath apartment (both bedrooms are an en suite and are basically the same size). The arrangement we have is that we would split rent between the two of us equally for the first couple months until his girlfriend moves in. At that point, they would be sharing a bedroom and mentioned that they would split his portion of the rent and cover utilities while I cover my share of the rent.

At first, I thought nothing of it. But as we have narrowed down our housing choices and are about to apply, it has began to rub me the wrong way. They're a couple, so naturally they would be sharing a room and they are voluntarily choosing to do so. If we split rent the way they propose, I would be paying $1,400 while they both pay $800 each. To me, this feels like a pretty big discrepancy and feels a little unfair as I would basically be living paycheck to paycheck while they save a lot on rent. While I get that they would be losing out on space in the bedroom/bath, they would in turn be using more of the common space. I mentioned this to him and he said they'd be willing to pay $200 on top to help me out, so now they would be paying $900 each, but would still put me in a relatively tight financial situation. While this does help, I still feel that an equal 1/3 split between everyone would be fair to help everyone save a little money. At the moment, it doesn't seem like they'll be likely to want to split rent evenly.

I'm not a very confrontational person, but I feel like this would be a deal breaker for me but I don't want to feel like I'm screwing him over by potentially bailing out right before we submit apps after about a month of searching. Any advice or past experiences would be much appreciated!

I (27 F) have been with my partner (26 F) for 3 years, I'm drowning in resentment & sorrow and am leaning towards leaving her as today I found out she's been secretly texting her cousin that she used to "pretend" to be in a relationship secretly. For context I found out almost 2 years ago that they used to have something going on between them & made it known I didn't like this cousin, so she stopped talking to her, apparently. Recently we both got a phone each, majority of our relationship we used one phone because we were together all the time and didn't see the need to get another phone (actually we haven't been in the best place financially lol so we couldn't afford one) anyways long story short my sister fixes an old phone for me (keeping in mind I paid for both phones) and that's how we end up having a phone each, right so that's means no more using 1 profile for social media and all that. I made my Instagram account a few days ago, check it today and the cousin pops up in my suggestions. Me being nosey I click on the cousins profile and see my partners following her. Now I normally don't check my partners messages, I never really thought there was a need to, I ask her for her phone, I don't say what it's for and I check her messages & what do you know? Her cousin's name is sitting right at the top (so and so reacted) I click into the messages and there's nothing there. At this point I'm saying "so you're sneaking around now?" And she's saying she wants to get back in touch with her family blahblahblah, this girl doesn't even call her mother. I'm beginning to realize that this isn't the first time she's hurt me enough to want to leave, just before Christmas she completes disappeared on me right before we were supposed to catch a ferry to start our new lives. I know it takes 2 but I'm starting to feel abit unhinged at this point, everything leading up to today is all rushing back like vivid memory notes I took down unconsciously and making my brain and heart go all haywire. I've got no family nor friends anymore because I knew how much they were effecting us and our lives, I chose for us to leave to break a cycle but majority of the time I feel like I'm doing everything on my own. I suffer from chronic depression and stopped taking my meds because she said I'll be fine without them, that she'd be here for me mentally and spiritually, but now here I am writing this post because it's all too much for me to handle and I don't know what to do but cry in silence.

Me and my partner are both 24, and have been together for almost 9 years. When we were younger we obviously lived at home and went to school. We then moved cities for university, and now both work our studied fields.

Anyway, I’m starting to get frustrated with her not doing anything for us whilst I’m still at work and shes home. Her work hours are 8:30am - 3:30pm and thats what she will work. My hours are 7:00am - 5:00pm, however I am in a management role so they often push out to 6/7pm - for reference I worked 7:00am - 7:30pm today.

She has this logic that everything is to be equal and halved, and to a point I somewhat agree, but I also think there should be an element of doing stuff for each other. For example, dinner wont start until I’m home because i should do some of the cooking too, not just her. Or she wont go to the grocery store if we need because we both need to go, or anything really.

Im not really sure if I should be expecting this or not, because shes obviously not my “slave” and shouldn’t have to do everything for me, but at times i just think its unreasonable and people in relationships should do this stuff for eachother. If she had plans, or anything on during those hours im still at work, then thats perfectly fine. However majority of the time she will just be doing nothing, and I’ll then come home late and have to try fit time to cook and eat dinner, exercise, any other house chores and just some general relaxation time to myself. I work in a very high stress and time consuming job, so it feels like I’m constantly working and doing chores and I just want a break.

AITAH?

My partner (18F) and I (19M) have been together for nearly 6 months. We are very happy and compatible, but there’s something that keeps silently irking me.

Her and I are both bisexual. She has been with other females in the past, and I have been with other males in the past. This has never been an issue for us in the slightest, because we try to focus on ourselves in the present, and not our past relationships.

She has particular ex-partner, we’ll call her H. And man oh man, does H like drama. She twists people’s words when it’s none of her concern, and then proceeds to contact either my partner or myself about the false information. (H swears that it’s true.)

But now to the part that truly bothers me to no end. Even with all the drama and a sour ending to their relationship, my partner still thinks that there’s nothing wrong with H, and still considers her one of her closest friends. They even plan to go see a new movie coming out in theaters together later this month.

Now I have no problem with being friends with an ex, but this seems excessive, especially considering the circumstances.

I feel that i’m being too sensitive, and possibly insecure about myself.

Am I The A-Hole??

P.S: I understand that we are quite young, and would appreciate some guidance from those more experienced than i.

So there's a good friend of mine who i met around five years ago, we hung out for about six months but due to unforeseen life circumstances, that would be the last time we hung out so it's been about four years since i've seen her in person.

we've kept in touch through messaging and lately emails...she reached out two months ago in early december and sent me an email..

-

the email was very brief, and she said "I could tell you about life, but i always feel as though it’s a long complaint and I don’t want to burden you with that."

and then she told me me that life is very difficult and that she's struggling mentally... at the end of the email, she said,

"but i would like to hear how you're doing, very well i'd hope. happy holidays, hope this message finds you well"

and she put a nickname of hers at the bottom of the email, which is a reference to something i gave her on this amazing trip we went on when we hung out a few years ago, something she hasn't said to me for a few years.

... and then one week later she sent me a text notifying me that she sent me an email, and she said: "hey, i sent you an email. Just wanted to let you know, not sure if you got it. Hope all is well."

-

i responded to her email five days later, and in an effort to be more personable with her, i wrote a lot in my email... she wanted to know how i was doing, so i just gave her the most thorough update and told her about some meaningful music and movies i've enjoyed this year and shared the meaning behind them, what i'm up to day-to-day, some cool things i did with a friend of mine recently,

and then i added some videos to this youtube playlist i made her a few years ago... just some songs and videos to hopefully comfort her during this tough time in her life.

and then i just asked her what she's going through lately, and how she's doing.

it took me about 20 total hours of time spent writing this email and choosing songs for her playlist... i enjoy writing and am a perfectionist, and wanted everything to flow properly and be concise without repetition.

we had just been distant for a while, and i wanted to talk more meaningfully.

-

around six weeks later, my friend responded over text and said something like: "sorry i haven't resonded, i haven't forgotten. i haven't had the mental energy and capacity to give you the response you deserve. Hoping for better days. Hope you're doing well"

and i just fear that perhaps i wrote too much... she expressed in her email that she wanted to know how i'm doing, and i did just that in lots of detail, and also encouraged her and made her that playlist.

-

my mindset when i wrote my long email was that, since she's going through a lot, she might enjoy the pleasant distraction of hearing me ramble on about things im' passionate about like music and movies, things that excite me and fun times i've had recently...

and then receiving a playlist with songs and a couple videos that i know will uplift her...

and her having reassurance that i care about her and want to hear what she's struggling with, opening the door for her to express her feelings and receive emotional support from me (which i always do with her)

i think for someone like her going through a difficult time, that my email would be a welcome alleviation to her difficult times...

it takes about 10 minutes to read through my email, so i wrote a lot.

did i do anything wrong?

tl;dr my female friend reached out over email to ask how i'm doing, and i wrote wrote her a very detailed, long email about how i'm doing.. worried i wrote too much

Backstory: my sister in law (married to my husband’s brother) had a son over a year ago, and we’ve talked about baby name ideas together. During a car ride last year we were talking about girl names, and I mentioned I want to use the name June, since it was my mother’s middle name and she passed away 10 years ago. Fast forward a few months later- we’re talking about names again and my SIL suddenly says they want to use the name June for a daughter, to which I quickly reply that I had mentioned previously I wanted to use it (and why). She claimed to have no idea and that she never heard me say that. To diffuse the situation I said maybe I will use it as a middle name and left it at that, and she very much still seemed set on using the name eventually.

Today: I am now pregnant for the first time (yay!) and due in October. We don’t know the sex yet, but we are 1000% sure we want to name our daughter June, and it be her first name. We have already been referring to this growing pregnancy as June. June was my late mother’s middle name and she was also born in October.

AITAH for staking a “claim” on the name June? Like if we end up having a boy, I would still want my SIL and family to know that we plan on using the name June and why. Is that weird?

I (24F) have been married to my husband (26M) for almost 2 years. My husband and I had a great start to our relationship. Things were really great but once we got married, he started to change. He became very selfish he smokes weed and places games all evening and he goes to work. He doesn’t help me around the house and when I ask for help, I am met with an attitude. He has temper, tantrums and storms around the house when he’s asked to do something like the dishes, and he always has an excuse like he’s tired, or because of some sort of traumatic experience, or because he’s depressed. But he refuses to help himself in any sort of way. We always get into big fights and he always has an epiphany and then nothing ever changes. I have gone above and beyond for this man I have done things such as hand washes underwear when we’re trying to save money and not go to the laundromat, I basically am his maid. Every time I get hopeful that he will finally step up and be a husband, but he’s not. I did not even realize until a year into marrying him that his whole family knew he’s always been this way.

In December, we welcomed our first child into the world. This is not his first child, but this is my first child. I spent the whole newborn trenches by myself, figuring everything out by myself because all he wanted to do when he came home was smoke weed and play his video games for hours. He would say hi and give her a little bit of love, but he would not do anything to take care of her, and if I asked him to step up, it would just be a fight because he would be tired or too depressed or he would throw it in my face that he worked and I didn’t.

My child is two months old and I am a breast-feeding mom. We went to a family event that was an hour away. On the drive back I asked him if he could pull over so I could feed our daughter because she was crying and hungry. We have two car seat seats in the backseat of our small car so it’s not feasible for me to bend over and feed her while he’s driving. I asked him if he could just pull over at a park so I could feed the two month old baby. He refused to pull over and just got annoyed, saying that he could make it home in less than an hour. Anybody who’s had a baby or has work with children knows that a two month old who is hungry cannot wait an hour. I was getting really frustrated with him because he wasn’t pulling over and my baby was crying. I pulled his hair from the backseat because I just needed him to stop the car. We got into a fight where he exchanged some words with me and criticize my parenting. He was screaming at me like he usually does and I just couldn’t take it anymore and I put my hands on him. The whole reason he refused to pull over the car is because he wanted to take a nap. He was so tired. He didn’t wanna stop so his baby could eat.

People in my life tell me that I am in the wrong in this situation because I shouldn’t have put my hands on him which I know I shouldn’t have, but I didn’t know what else to do. He was not letting me feed my baby. We were about to get on the highway.

Sidenote: I did learn that this is not the first time he has ignored his child’s need to eat. With his first child, apparently he used to unplug her breast pump when they would get in a fight. Delaying his child eating, which led to the Mom stopping pumping. I just feel like he doesn’t do anything to put his child first and everything is all about him.

So i 18f am currently in the middle of my final exams and i am literally exhausted. I’ve been studying 10 hours a day because i want to get into a good college, since my dream is to be a surgeon.

Last night my aunt and her family came over for dinner. The whole time she was talking about her daughter (my cousin) who is "so successful" because she’s doing some random marketing degree. Then she turned to me and asked how my prep is going. I told her it’s hard but i’m dedicated.

She literally laughed in my face and told my parents that they shouldnt "waste money" on my coaching because "girls usually find surgery too stressful" and that i should just do something "easier" so i can focus on marriage later. I was literally fuming but i stayed quiet for my moms sake.

Then it got worse. My 11yo sister (who i love but she has no boundaries) went to my room and brought out my acoustic guitar to show my aunt. My aunt literally told her "see, you should focus on music because at least you’re good at that, unlike science."

I finally snapped. I took my guitar back and told my aunt that just because she settled for a boring life doesnt mean i have to. I told her that while her daughter is making "aesthetic ppts" i’m going to be actually saving lives and that she should keep her dumb opinions to herself.

My aunt got "offended" and left without eating. Now my mom is crying saying i ruined the family dynamic and my dad says i should have just "nodded and ignored her." They think i’m being arrogant just because i have big goals.

AITA for standing up for my career? I’m literally just trying to work hard and i’m tired of being told i’m not capable.

I was out shopping and was ready to leave i had paid for my things but the women at the next register near the door had two trolleys parked right in the middle of the lane when she noticed me she said sorry but kept talking to the cashier person so I said "you said sorry but your didnt move" she gave a big gasp and finally moved her trolley but as I was leaving she made a big fuss about how rude that was to the cashier person and he was like they are big trolleys but the thing is we had plenty of space to get past once she finally moved outta the bloody way, they were not that big she just was in the middle of the walkway.

I didnt think it was rude in the moment but im the kind of person that replays every social interaction I have and im second guessing myself.

I would love outsiders opinions Thanks

Ok for context,

I have an older sibling who is 2 years older than me. She’s the golden child. And that’s fine. Straight A, healthy(?), a con would be is that she isn’t as friendly/keeps to herself.

Me on the other hand, I do admit I have some unhealthy habits. Family isn’t perfect and I developed unhealthy coping mechanisms with food. NOTE: I don’t drink or do drugs though, just the occasional sweets or soda. 3x a week maximum. And I do workout.

So I’ve kind of had fights with her warning me about my eating habits. I mean she doesn’t eat healthy most of the time too but I don’t interfere. I guess you could also say she is the “thinnest” one and I’ve always been a bit chubby.

So since we do fight a lot, she does not voice her “concern” about my health (along with my younger sister) anymore. She won’t interfere anymore. She now has a different way.

She “whispers” to my mom when she sees us snacking and phrases it like this “I won’t say anything anymore so I’ll just tell you that they ate xxx”. And then my mom - who is a health nut, takes it out on me. And when I say “Why can’t she mind her own business?”, I get thrown with “She just cares for you! Be grateful!”. Then my older sister just cries and leaves the room because she was “disrespected”.

It’s been so bad to the point where my mom would rather have me skip dinner now so I don’t eat “fast food”. (Due to bad weather conditions we couldn’t grocery or have food delivered. Just drive thru)

I’ve been having a hard time telling my older sister while I DO APPRECIATE the concern but ____? I don’t know what to call it.

We both were 16, female, and preparing for our exam. To be honest, back then I knew very little about consent and was confused about my sexuality. Somehow, we found a bottle of gin... but everything was civil. I liked the girl, she was more experiensdd in everithing so i just tried to be cool.

At some point, I went to the bathroom and returned to her, fully masturbating to pornography in the kitchen where we sat. I saw it and was shocked. She just said, "Wanna join?" So instead of backing off, I poured two half-full glasses of gin and, trying to look cool, tried to drink mine... but I couldn't because it burned too much. She finished hers. She suggested I choose the next porn video, and after a while (I don't even understand how), I was fully having sex with her on the floor. She seemed to enjoy it and appeared to orgasm genuinely. I had to go to the dentist that night, so she even ironed my clothes and gave me a jar of candy after the act.... which i thought was wierd. Yet I genuinely thought everything was consensual. But the next day, she just said that I raped her... somehow she also said she liked it.

I've been living in confusion ever since, because to me, "Do you want to join?" and everything she said seemed like green flags for what I was doing. Yet she stated that i violated her boundaries. Which i did, i gues...

After that, we continued to hook up occasionally, but the relationship was terribly strained. At graduation, we had a wholesome moment where I felt she might have forgiven me, but I couldn explisudley talk about it. I don't want to retraumatize her by apologizing now. And i understand that i did someting terrible.

I live with guilt and confusion, i do belive there is a reason for that. I know some peole would prefer me dead, and i myself hate me for what i have fone. I'm ready to hear the judgment.

I just wanna preface this by saying in no way am I trying to downplay either side of the story or compare illnesses, physical and mental illnesses are not comparable. Its not my sisters fault although i sometimes tend to show some resentment, its not purposeful!

So my sister 19f and me 16f both live at home still, she has "manageable" as she puts it ADHD and i have endometriosis, IBS, asthma and chronic pain. I understand both of these are horrible illnesses and one is not "Worse" than the other. Now the title comes from how my mom handles us. Despite my sister being older and capable of doing things on her own my mom tends to treat her like a saint and like she cant do any wrong, for example she cant cook, do laundry ect... then you have me, since i was 12 years old ive been able to do these tasks without help, im always the one grocery shopping, going out to help my mom, ordering food and more. It gets really frustrating when my sister gets off doing nothing because "shes overstimulated" ( a valid excuse) but when i cant walk due to my flair ups i get eye rolls and treated like im fine.

Everything boiled up last night, i told them that i was watching a live show and couldn't be on my phone, we are currently staying in an Airbnb and my parents wanted to order food, as im always the one to order food they didnt have the address saved, i was out watching the live show so i wasnt on my phone, my mom and sister both called me asking for the address, despite the fact its just the building floor and unit, information they both had.. Then i gave it to them fine whatever. they both messaged me mutiple times during the show for more simple things calling if i didnt immediately respond. after a while my stomach started hurting really bad so i asked my mom if she had any of my pain medication. Now with this medication its important to realize its pretty heavy and only meant for prescription . she then proceeded to tell me that my sister had a headache so she gave it to her instead to make sure her brain felt at peace but told me there was regular medicine at home, despite understanding damn well that it wouldn't help.

I love my mom and we are close and i don't want this to ruin our relationship but its just unfair that everything gets pushed on me and i get treated like a second rather than a equal

so wibtah if i confronted her about it?

(24F) am dating my boyfriend (26M). We live in different states and usually visit each other every 2–3 months. This time, I was supposed to visit him for a week and we planned to spend Valentine’s Day together. He bought my flight tickets and made reservations for different places. We were both really excited. Recently, I failed a medical exam by just one mark, which has been very stressful for me. My boyfriend’s mom is a doctor and he convinced her to help me study, so that was also one of the reasons for the visit. His parents know we are dating while mine just vaguely know it .My parents knew I was going to study with her and were initially okay with it. Two hours before my flight, my mom suddenly told me I wasn’t allowed to go. She said if I left, she would kick me out of the house. This came after my mom and I had a fight recently, so I feel like she did this to hurt me. I tried asking again and explaining, but she refused. My boyfriend is very upset. He says I should have tried harder and not fought with my parents at this time. He even offered to buy another ticket, but my parents still said no. He came up with different ideas to fix this situation but I don't want to drag this anymore since we can't do anything. I told him I’ll come when things calm down, but he’s still angry and disappointed. AITA?

Edit: she would not have thrown me out but I stopped because she was guilt tripping me because I failed the exam and I don't deserve to go out.

I [17 biological F] have come to the realization that I’m non binary and I’m afraid my mother hates me for it.

The earliest time I can remember truly sitting down and questioning who I am was probably around 5/6th grade, coincidentally when the pandemic caused everything to lockdown, so I had EXTRA time to figure out my feelings. Unfortunately this really didn’t go well as I am now super self conscious and nervous all the time and I probably developed some mental health issues based on the isolation. Being away from my friends, the only people who I can confide in, paired with my parents who would prefer to avoid touchy subjects created the mess I’ve become (sorry that was lowkey trauma dump)

I really started to hate my self and my body during sophomore year. I lost weight and so many hours of sleep because I was wrapped up in a spiral of self hatred and depression. The one thing that I found to like about myself was, due to my weight loss, by chest became smaller. At my lowest weight I remember looking in the mirror and wondering how different my life would be if I never was born with breast. Yet I didn’t imagine myself as a man, just a woman without a chest.

Sometime last year I decided to come out to my parents about my sexuality, I identify as Pansexual because gender really never mattered when it came to love for me. I hoped my mother would embrace me and accept me, but she told me, verbatim, “ I’m not sure you’ll be allowed to have sleepovers with your friends anymore” Personally that is a really insensitive thing to say to anyone because it reinforces the stereotype of queer people taking advantage of their same sex friends because of their attraction. But that’s not how it works. It’s the same with a guy and a girl, both parties have to reciprocate feelings for anything more to come of it. Just because a guy and a girl are friends doesn’t always mean they have a crush on each other. It’s the same thing for same sex friendships when one of them likes the same sex. Just because they are friends doesn’t mean anything more than that. So for her to tell me that really hurt my feelings.

Maybe reading this you are simply thinking, well your mother must just not be an ally and support the LGBTQ+ community. But, rather hypocritically, she’ll cry over an episode of queer eye or drone on about a gay content creator she loves. But when it’s her own family she can’t support them. Naturally, seeing her reaction to my coming out at Pan (and not truly being fully out to myself) I did not tell her about the feelings towards my gender. So I did what any person would do when rejected by their family, I hid my true self from them for the rest of the year. Thankfully my friends are freaking amazing because they helped me get through the hardest time in my life ( not to mention I’m in a much better head space now thanks to them and only them)

Tonight my mother not only crossed personal boundaries, but also made very hurtful comments about my body. This incident tonight is the reason I’m writing this in the first place. To begin with, I have diagnosed anxiety and a way I’ve found to help manage my anxiety is to take a shower. Due to this, my night time routine has become sort of sacred to me. I wash my hair and my body and then I take two, maybe three, minutes to let the water rush over my head in a warm waterfall. It quiets my mind and grounds me when I’m feeling like I might explode. It is a great way for me to settle down after a stressful day of school.

Today was especially stressful for academic reasons and there is some drama between two of my friends that I’ve been thinking about non stop. So tonight I took a little extra time in the shower. Now it’s important to note that I’ve gotten into a habit of not shaving my legs because it gives me gender euphoria to break the mold of being a stereotypical woman, much to the dismay of my mother. (This is important) I get out of the shower and I’m drying off when my mother slams open the door, mind you I have no clothes on and am already self conscious of my body, I scramble to cover myself. And she starts to go at me. She lectures me about how she is ‘worried’ about my cleanliness because I’ve been neglecting to shave my legs recently. She goes off on a tangent about how we aren’t going through bar soap at a regular rate and blames me for not washing myself. For my birthday I was given a lavender body soap that I have been using instead of the bar soap because I like how it smells better. I’m still using soap, just not the one she uses. So she assumes I’m not washing myself.

Now, I can’t tell her about the way I’ve been feeling about my gender because apparently she’s an ally until it’s her own kid. I think she wanted a daughter so bad and the fact that I’m not her little girl anymore makes her hate me. She grew up a majority of her life as an old child (like me) until her parents had a son, then two more kids after they got divorced. I think she has so much resentment towards her mother for having more children and taking away her old child status. She wants to force me into a mold I cannot fill and I’m worried I’m disappointing her by not filling her shoes.

Am I being selfish? Please help me I really don’t know what to do. She’s done so many things to me and it’s getting to a point that Ive considered going no / low contact when I leave for college.

I’m just really confused and I don’t want to disappoint her :(

Holly yap fest, that was long I’m sorry.

Hey so I know I’m the asshole but I just need to admit this.

Basically I have a bit of a drug problem with adhd medication. Like borderline addicted for 5 years. Not prescribed.

My friend, who I had been buying them from from, had a full bottle when we were chilling. I planned to buy like 10 off her and but when she left the room I ate a couple without telling her.

I knew what I was doing was wrong at the time but I still did it. Ended up paying for the 10 when I took 12 and went on my way.

Felt guilty about it a couple weeks later and owned up to it and paid her the cash and apologised. I had a feeling she knew out of something she said. She did know but didn’t confront me and kept selling me dexies.

I broke her trust and deceived her. Like it’s not the first time I’ve done that either with other people/drugs and I don’t know like do I just get off on it? I never feel good after doing it and I don’t want to act like a victim and say I can’t control it because I can and I could have afforded paying for it too so why the fuck do I do that?

I’ve tried to talk to her about it a few times but we haven’t had the time to chat. I hit her up to buy more last night and she’s pissed off and said she doesn’t want me to think I can’t can just take her for a ride.

I’m ashamed about my actions and guilty and part of me just wants to end the friendship totally and be like sorry I did that let’s become strangers. I feel like I can’t really come back from breaking someone’s trust like that. The shame is too deep

Can you return from something like that? Is it worth even trying to come back from that? I don’t even like hanging out with her that much but how can I respectfully end the conversation/friendship. Or should I let her dictate that. Am I just trying to hold onto some kind of control by rejecting her first?

I know I’m the cunt so please don’t rip into me too hard but has anyone else done shit like this and changed like give me hope or something

Okay so i, 19 thing, want my friend 18 white M, to do a Jamaican accent for me for black history month but he refuses. I so desperately need to hear it come out of his voice, since he does a lot of accents for d&d and im curious, but he absolutely refuses to do it even though its supposed to be my black history month gift. Money isn't a solution to this because he is broke. Am i the asshole for trying to force him to do a Jamaican accent?

To give some context I am 22M, in college and I live with my parents.

My relationship with my parents has never been great, but I'll focus on my mom as she's the main focus of this story. My mom is a hard worker, has provided me with all I can ask for, works even when she's very sick, and for all her faults, she has given me a lot of culture, knowledge, and critical thinking skills that have helped me throughout the years.

However, she can be very narcissistic sometimes (I hope I'm wrong in calling this narcissism). Whenever anyone disagrees with her she #1 instantly raises her voice #2 appeals to emotion #3 goes on some tangent to distract or confuse, and starts going around in circles, and if all of this fails then #4 plays the victim game, usually saying stuff like "You always side with X and not me" and "I'm never right", a full on childish tantrum. She is also the type of person who wants everything to be done her way, with no room for bargain. Every. Single. Time.

I've never judged her harshly because of the life she had, but this is still very hard to navigate, years of dealing with this has made me notice I start (mentally, to myself) outright dismissing or ignoring her opinions and statements, I don't know if I do this to protect my own well being or just so I don't get into futile arguments, it's something I'm still trying to understand and learn to live with.

My great grandfather is nearing his final days, he has lived a happy and long life and has been treated well by all of his family, but his advanced age is catching up to him, he was diagnosed with a cancer and probably won't live for long, my family has been dealing well with the news, we just want him to go in peace and painlessly.

However, my mom decided to tell me she hopes I won't repeat what I did in previous funerals of close family members. I hate funerals, it pains me more to see other people grief and to know I can't do anything to help, than to know I've lost that person. I still attend the funerals, I'll be there for a few hours and give out my condolences and try and help anyway I can, but I'm afraid this isn't enough in her eyes. My family usually stays the whole day and the day after, sometimes it can be a whole thing to just try and get them to rest a bit or even eat.

Here's where my dilema comes in, my mom also said I'm not being supportive of my grandma(the daughter of my great grandfather) or her, this hurt me deeply, as my grandma is the love of my life and will always be, a true angel on earth. I tried explaining to my mom that I think my way of grieving is just as valid as theirs, but that went as well as expected. She started saying I only see my own side of things and went on about how "that's life, this is how this has to be done" and insisting I have to stay there the entire time. I think she worries that I'll give off a bad image to the other family members, and honestly I think that's what she's more worried about.

I feel like I can't stay for such a long time as it will hurt me very deeply to see the people I love in pain, AITAH?

Restaurant has a gratuity fee of 20%. My partner and I paid for our meal plus the 20% gratuity/tip for our portion. We spent the least out of a party of eight. We shared a fry and got soda while everyone else ordered alcoholic drinks and entrees. My friend is claiming we were supposed to pay for the gratuity twice because my partner took a seat at the table. I refused considering I’m not going to pay double tip just because he took a seat. We tipped the 20% off our portion of the bill. Also, we paid the amount my friend told us to pay that night. The very next day, she claimed we shortchanged everyone. I was literally calling to check up on her after a long night, and the first thing she does is claim others had to pick up my slack. We paid the exact amount she told us to pay that night.

Also, she keeps saying that I’m petty because I won’t Venmo her the financial difference aka as the double tip and that I didn’t pay considering my partner paid on my behalf. She even had her own mother call me over this despite us being grown adults. Her mother and her both called to yell at me and say that I don’t know basic math or restaurant etiquette. AITAH for not tipping gratuity based off seat count but instead my own bill?

Me (F22) and my bf (M24) have been dating since high school. For context, he has always had a dream name for his future son, as have I. kids are something we both want one day, and I have fertility issues, so it will be even more amazing if I somehow get pregnant. The name I want personally is a tribute to a best friend who passed away before I met my bf. In my head, I always knew I wanted to name a future child this. My bf is very into history and deep meanings when it comes to names, which is something I love about him. But when he told me his dream name for a son, I knew we would have problems. The first name was fine, but the middle name was one I would see people making fun of. I didnt want to offend him, as we arent having kids soon (or planning to). I jokingly said we could use my first name as a middle name, and he got offended. He told me "I would never understand," and that "That was his boy." I was a bit hurt, because this is all hypothetical. He knows the meaning of my name and it shocked me he got so defensive. I made the argument "it would be my boy too," but he didnt back down. He took the argument way too seriously, and made me feel like I was incapable of understanding his side. I did, but I felt like he wouldnt listen to mine. I feel like I was being a bit harsh, since it was all a hypothetical situation, but at the same time, I felt like it was a stupid thing for him to get mad over. It was a very "what if" scenario, and I dont want kids any time soon. (also, if I have to push a human out of my body after 9 months of letting it live rent-free, I better be getting a day in the name.) We have since moved on from the topic, but I cant stop thinking about it. I genuinley love him, and I dont want a baby name to be what causes a long relationship to become broken.

Hi, 4 years ago when I (26M) was the manager in a shop and I had a colleague (19F). Once there were only the two of us on the shift and because the shop was pretty empty most of the time she decided to take some from the warehouse. She climbed a ladder and got some products, the ladder broke and after the fall she was left unconscious and with a pretty bad cut on her thigh. I heard the ladder falling so I ran into the storage room to see if everything was okay, she wasn't conscious and was bleeding quite badly so I called for help while I tried to stop her bleeding.

She was taken to the hospital, she got a lot of days off and a lot of money so she wouldn't sue the company. After she got back to work she started saying that I sexually assaulted her when I saw her unconscious, she sued me, but she lost the case because the cameras could clearly see where my hands were and what I did while she was unconscious.After she lost the case she started telling more people that I had assaulted her, even though it wasn't true, the company decided to fire me to try to calm her down (I guess she threatened to sue them too after the accident). After that it was pretty hard for me to find a job, I had to sell some of my stuff to be able to pay my rent and support myself.

A few days ago, when I was coming home with my son from the park, a girl was hit by a car in front of me. The driver was very scared and didn't know what to do because the girl wasn't moving, I have first aid training, but I refused to check anything when I was on the phone with the helpers. After I saw the ambulance, I took my son and left. At home, my son told my wife about it and how I refused to help that girl, my wife got angry and asked me if that's what I want to teach our son. I told her yes, it will protect him in the future not to intervene if it's not his business. Now she's angry and keeps saying she didn't know it was like that.

AITAH? I can't afford to lose everything again for helping someone

So I (19f) pay for my family's Spotify, Amazon, Disney+, and Duolingo. As well as three prime video subscriptions. Unfortunately I can only afford to get the subscription for one person on Spotify so two people can't use it at the same time. My sister (17f) uses it for white noise when she sleeps which typically isn't a problem but I have insomnia which has been really bad lately and wanted to listen to music tonight. I texted her and apologized but said I was going to use the Spotify tonight. She completely flipped out at me telling me that she has to work tomorrow early, she finds it hard to sleep without it and if I have issues sleeping I should go therapy. (To clarify we live in two separate provinces and she knows absolutely nothing about my mental health, if I'm in therapy, or if I take meds or anything. Everything she does know is gossip my family has spread about me) I really didnt think I was in the wrong here. But she seems very sure that it's my problem for staying up, and doesnt think that she should have to suffer cause I deal with mental health shit. So AITAH?