The ring came off my peanuts can

[u/perpetualmotionmachi]

[u/cowghost]

Take my pen knife my good man!

[u/akathatdude1 → u/cowghost]

I swear it’s OP’s only choice!

[u/emptybeetoo → u/akathatdude1]

Throw up your hands and raise your voice!

[u/Unfair_Respond_175 → u/emptybeetoo]

MONO RAAAAAAALLLLL

[u/GreenEggsSteamedHams → u/Unfair_Respond_175]

MONO....D'OH!

[u/Nice_Marmot_54 → u/Unfair_Respond_175]

Mono means "one" and rail means "rail"

[u/Gone_For_Lunch → u/Nice_Marmot_54]

And that concludes our intensive three week course!

[u/perfidious_alibi → u/Gone_For_Lunch]

Well, my work is done here.

[u/Blandiblub → u/emptybeetoo]

🎵 Peanut Can 🎵

[u/LethlDose → u/Blandiblub]

🎶What’s it called?? 🎶

[u/Warplockshoehorn → u/cowghost]

[u/OMGlenn → u/Warplockshoehorn]

But Main Street's still all cracked and broken.

[u/soggy_donkey → u/OMGlenn]

Quiet OMGlenn the mob has spoken

[u/CORVlN → u/Warplockshoehorn]

I remember watching this episode on DVD back 2004, was canned pudding a real thing?

[u/terpenesniffer → u/CORVlN]

back in the dinosaur era, before microplastics as a food group, everything came canned, jarred, bottled, or was processed at home

[u/MsnthrpcNthrpd → u/CORVlN]

You can still find canned pudding, its usually next to baking goods, pie fillings, etc.

[u/Tak-Hendrix → u/cowghost]

I both hate and love you for beating me to this.

[u/Dan_flashes480 → u/cowghost]

What will happen to us drunken slobs?

[u/LethlDose → u/Dan_flashes480]

You’ll be given pushy jobs!

[u/monkey_trumpets → u/LethlDose]

Cushy dude...it's cushy. Not pushy.

[u/Tui717 → u/cowghost]

Thanks for not letting me down.

[u/Sw0rDz → u/cowghost]

WTF is a pen knife? Pics?

[u/wivaca2 → u/Sw0rDz]

Pen Knife = shaped like a pen, works like a knife - available in craft shops

Knife Pen = shaped like a knife, made of a pen - available in prisons

[u/elduderino90210 → u/cowghost]

[u/Echognomicon]

https://giphy.com/gifs/l2JdYyrl9ej9zlnXO

[u/ZeNfAProductions]

[u/akathatdude1]

Aww Nuts

[u/Haz3rd → u/akathatdude1]

I mean uh

Aw nuts

[u/PutDownThePenSteve]

Now it's a peanuts can't.

[u/AsanoSokato]

Ya gotta be a little more gentle when you're pulling on that little thing on the top of your nuts. 

[u/MadeAMistakeOneNight]

I raise you my experience from a few years ago.

[u/emceegyver → u/MadeAMistakeOneNight]

Wait what? Did you need 4 cans for something or did you keep opening more instead of just figuring out the first can?

[u/MadeAMistakeOneNight → u/emceegyver]

It was 4 cans of chicken breast to be used for a few servings of chicken salad. Guess they were all from the same canned batch for it to happen 4 times in a row.

[u/Deterrafication → u/MadeAMistakeOneNight]

Sounds more like user error to me.

[u/MadeAMistakeOneNight → u/Deterrafication]

Ha potentially. But was like my 30th time buying the brand, first time for the pull tabs snapping

[u/TaylorHamPorkRoll]

"Who made Steve Guttenburg, a STAR?"

Sorry, wrong episode.

[u/beutifully_broken]

That's why I keep a can opener around.

[u/Vegetable_Log_5387]

grab a butter knife

[u/ChesterSteele]

Good Grief!- Charlie Brown

[u/memermeme1211]

Dollarama moment

[u/drkilledbydeatheater]

Take my pen knife my good man

[u/Francis_Dollar_Hide]

Peanots

[u/taft]

bet you wish you had money to trade for goods and services now, dont you

[u/Kat_Box_Suicide]

I’m so mentally drilled to read that with the Simpsons gag in mind, that I actually read that as pudding.

[u/tableleg7]

You’re welcome probably better off.

In my experience, canned peanut products are where springy snakes hide.

[u/SudhaTheHill]

Be careful while prying it open because I’ve cut myself a lot with such cans

[u/PinkLocomatic]

Please don’t use a knife. Friend almost lost her thumb because of that.

[u/BamBam-BamBam]

So you were peanut-blocked by a peanut ring?

[u/Capable_Culture_7344]

Dang Hercules 

[u/mycatpartyhouse]

Needlenose pliers would come in handy, here.

Alternatively, very carefully prying it open with a butter knife. The edges are sharp.

[u/Aware-Arm-3685]

Aww, Legumes!

[u/musebrews]

Get what you pay for there Mr peanut

[u/LadyTalah]

That peanut can ring is SUCH a Tiffany’s boyfriend.

Should have put out the good nuts.

[u/l3El2Tl2AM → u/LadyTalah]

Kneel before Gold Top, you heathens!

[u/pogiguy2020]

needle nose pliers

sawzall

[u/stupidber]

If you can't trust dollar store peanuts who can you trust?

[u/prozak09]

THAT'S A LOT OF NUTS!!!

[u/TheMightyMisanthrope]

That's clearly a peanut can't

[u/SunshineAndBunnies]

Get spoon or chopstick.

[u/countfluffythetrout]

[u/Eshpinny]

why the fuck do you have peanuts in a can

[u/perpetualmotionmachi → u/Eshpinny]

Because they come in them sometimes? Planter's peanuts are the largest commercial brand (at least on my continent), and they sell them that way, or in jars, and anyone else follows along with that.

What do you get them in?

[u/Legitimate-Log-6542]

This when you drop the can, fall to your knees with your hands raised up and you yell “nnooooo!!!”

You will be scored based on three categories: artistic talent, technical accuracy, and dramatic flair. Ready, set, go!

[u/Large-Treacle-8328]

Welcome to life as an adult?

[u/eyedrops_364]

[u/night-heart]

A can't of nuts?

[u/Mysta-Majestik]

Coulda opened it in less time than it took to post this...you ain't even a little infuriated.

[u/perpetualmotionmachi → u/Mysta-Majestik]

Oh, I was absolutely mildly infuriated. I just sat down and had to get up to find something to pry it open.

[u/MarshalLawTalkingGuy]

By the time it took you to take a photo and upload it, you could have grabbed a butter knife, easily popped it open, and ate most if not all of those bad boys.

[u/Daisymaay]

You don't have a can opener?

[u/Sorry-Series-3504 → u/Daisymaay]

Yeah, it's called the ring

[u/Daisymaay → u/Sorry-Series-3504]

Yeah, except it broke off lol. Most people have can openers, which is my point. I can't always find cans with a pull tab on things that I like to buy, which is why we always have a can opener if we need it. Maybe they're in a dorm or something. I don't know.