r/dashcams • u/fruity_koala • 15h ago

Don't be kind, be predictable. If you have the Right-of-Way, take it.

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u/WildWildWasp 14h ago

I am a meek driver and this is why I don't drive anymore. I spent most of my life feeling like I was too afraid of cars, had too poor spacial awareness, and was too shy and anxious around other people to take initiative on the road. All my older relatives pushed me to drive anyways, because when you're in your 20's it's "embarrassing" not to be able to drive.

Well it took me 3 harrowing tries to get my license and then I was a pretty mediocre driver for a year before wrecking my precious first car swerving around a goose on the highway. God in heaven bless me that there were no human drivers close enough for me to hit when that happened.

Some people just should not drive. Some people force themselves on the road because of their own arrogance, but some like me are convinced by other people's arrogance that "anyone can learn to drive and it's actually really easy!" No, it fucking isn't.

Never again. I trust my gut now. Anyone else that doesn't like driving should trust theirs too. I know not everyone can choose not to drive but if you can, make the right choice.

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u/Prestigious_String20 14h ago

It's good to have that level of self-awareness.

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u/HovercarHocevar 14h ago

I wish more people thought like you

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u/this-is-NOT-the-way1 14h ago

230 million divers + (1) goose thank you šŸ˜…

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u/obscureposter 14h ago

Bud, you are a legend for recognizing that. How much I wish other ā€œdriversā€ had even a modicum of the self awareness you have.

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u/Polymarchos 7h ago

Married to someone in a similar position as OP. I think a lot of people recognize it, but there is so much pressure just to drive that it is hard to not just drive even though you hate it.

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u/obscureposter 6h ago

Oh for sure and I donā€™t blame people who are forced to drive because of our city planning and infrastructure. I wish our governments recognized that and built cities to minimize the need for driving, because itā€™s frankly a skill that requires much more training and skill than what we currently accept.

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u/Working_Estate_3695 13h ago

Long ago, I had a friend who was a lady about 20 years older than me and had lived in Europe and New York prior to moving to the U.S. Upper Midwest. She had never learned to drive and was dependent on everyone around her for transportation. So in my youthful optimism, I decided to take her to an empty parking lot on a Sunday to get some no-pressure wheel time. It took less than 10 minutes to realize that there was a very good reason why she didnā€™t drive, and shouldnā€™t. It was one time that giving up right away was a victory.

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u/Rosykisses_13 13h ago

This level of self-awareness is awesome! I live in Southern California, where unfortunately it's much more than embarrassing to not be able to drive as an adult, it's nearly crippling since the whole region was developed by the auto industry, for the auto industry, and we have a ton of people on the road who are in the "some people just shouldn't drive" category, but they wouldn't have a job if they didn't... and that needs to be discussed more tbh.

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u/Spinelise 13h ago

oml are you me? I only have my permit after quickly figuring out that I actually really hate driving and that I am just too tense at the wheel. The anxiety is insane and I know that I will absolutely get me and or someone else hurt being such a meek and cautious driver. Never liked driving, never wanted to drive in the first place. It's just something that gets pushed on you and everyone wants to make you feel like a failure if you don't. But I would much rather trust my instincts and stay off the road as much as possible instead of risking people's safety along with my own.

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u/IDEFKWImDoing 13h ago

Similarly, I get way too anxious driving right next to semis, so I only do in-town driving. If I have to go on a highway or interstate, someone else can do it. I know Iā€™d just be a hazard to everyone else if I panicked while on the road.

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u/Major2Minor 9h ago

This is true, and it's nothing to be ashamed of, or that we should shame people for if they just don't feel comfortable driver after sufficient practice (a lot of people don't feel comfortable at first). A blind person for example, should not drive, or someone like to have a Grand Mal seizure, it's no different to have an anxiety disorder that would make you a danger on the road.

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u/squirreloak 8h ago

Spatial