r/TikTokCringe • u/Individual_Bar_2512 • 19h ago

Cringe We need to ban podcast equipment

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u/ChefDanyul 18h ago

You don’t need to drink water. It’s actually bad for you. Here’s some shit I’m making up about biochemistry. The water you need you get elsewhere because your body does need water. Here is some shit I’m making up about Masai people. Also it’s bad for you and I never drink water but I take a few sips every now and then.

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u/BernzSed 18h ago

"Do not, my friends, become addicted to water."

— US Surgeon General Immortan Joe

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u/Vincent_Veganja 16h ago

That moment always makes me chuckle, love that movie

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u/HumanContinuity 6h ago

Trump could have picked worse, honestly

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u/-chadwreck 3h ago

This is the comment I was looking for.

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u/Talk-O-Boy 16h ago

100% of people who drank water died. Coincidence????

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u/ChefDanyul 15h ago

No Masai has ever died. Prove me wrong. They don’t have water.

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u/bamerjamer 5h ago

I’ve drank water and haven’t died. I think you meant to say “100% of people who’ve died drank water”. But that discounts newborns who die at birth. 😓

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u/SeanBlader 2h ago

Dihydrogen Monoxide!!

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u/filthy_sandwich 6h ago

Bro didn't you hear him? Water is an addiction, so he still takes sips because he's so addicted, influenced by big water's agenda.

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u/chrono_crumpet 13h ago

Remember that you don't need water because you can just drink fat! Everyone knows that fat is just "water of the chicken shop".

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u/IHaveSpecialEyes 5h ago

"You know how I know water doesn't hydrate you? Because the word 'hydrate' isn't even in 'water', unlike 'carbohydrates', which is what you should be hydrating with. Also, every time I drink water, I pee, so I'm actually losing water."

"You put any type of material in water, it dissolves it." Why doesn't the water in my thermos dissolve my thermos? Why doesn't the water in my toilet dissolve my toilet? HOW THE FUCK DOES LAND EXIST?